I am a mom. Which means that my brain, emotions and actions are no longer 95% about me, but 95% about her and everyone else. It also means that I suffer from “mommy guilt,” and thus, I now neglect self care. I feel like this affects most moms and it makes me sad! Unfortunately, I don’t have all of the answers and this is really just a quick blog about my recent revelation on the subject.

UGH FUCK THIS SHIT! I am feeling that today. It is one of “those days,” where absolutely nothing is easy, fun, or going the way that I want it. It seems like everything is exponentially more difficult, taking me twice as long as it should and making me want to scream bloody fucking murder. Ya feel me?

Today is Election Day in America. We are fraught with anxiety, anger, hate, bitterness, and resentment. This is my fifth time voting for the President of the United States and I hated every minute. In previous elections I have been excited to vote, I have been well educated on my vote. I felt a genuine privilege to be an American who had the opportunity to vote.

I’ve been having a lot of conversations with friends that go something like this, “It was like, I don’t know… two weeks ago? No wait, maybe a month or so ago??” Only to conclude that whatever “it” was happened back in the Spring. I just don’t have any concept of time anymore, what day of the week it is, what month it is or why it even matters.

This time last year I was just settling into my new work environment and getting to know my co-workers. Most of them had a plant or two at their desk, but Fagel had four or five and would talk about them like they were her children.

It has been a long road getting here – “here” being in my home, full-time. I’ve worked for someone else since I was 15, and I’ve never really cared too much for authority. As my friends would say, “I do what I want,” and I do!